is
like an interplanetary blackout
that
causes every knee to bow
and
every eye to close
a
semi-quasi-metaphysical day of reckoning
taking
inventory of the last two thousand years
so
i’m placing my order
at
the drive thru window of the universe
and
the lady,
the
lady,
the
lady behind the counter keeps tapping her fingers
and
glaring at me
as
if i’m already supposed to know
exactly
what it is i want
when
i just now realized that i am a poet
an artist
a man
human
i’ve
been trying to live up to
who
the world wants me to be for so long
that
i’ve forgotten to examine the person i’ve become
like
i just found a favorite hat i thought was stolen
only
to find that it fits the head of the person i used to be
and
they keep telling me things like
love
means never having to say you’re sorry
but
that sounds more like war to me
and
i keep reading in class that
no
man is an island
then
why do i feel so alone
so
i’m poppin’ wheelies down the sidewalks of time
and
i can’t figure out whether my bike
is
too outdated a vehicle to get me down my path
or
if its not innovative enough
i
keep pedaling thru more and more gears
but
i will never pedal fast enough
to
run away from myself
its
like watching a black and white re-run of history
i
almost fooled myself into believing
that
it might not really be doomed to repeat
so
i’ve been trying to alter the denoument
instead
of just filling in the colors
so
i’m counting the patterns in the landscape of my dreams
and
its like i’m stuck in the eye of a tornado
a
living breathing testament to contradiction
if
death and life are polar opposites
then
how can i feel so dead inside
yet
for the first time feel truly alive
and
if chaos and calmness share no similar qualities
then
why do i feel so peaceful
when
i’m slowly going insane
its
like i’m trying to balance
my
aspirations on the edge of a cliff
i
need to know there’s something solid beneath my feet
but
i have to throw caution to the wind
and
now it feels like i’m chained to two trains
running
in different directions
and
each steam engine is pumping
red
hot ashes into the air
until
my lungs are filled
with
the pungent smoke of confusion and rage
but
this chip on my shoulder keeps
giving
me flack about taking it like a man
so
i take a deep breath and hold in my hit
i
should’ve stayed invisible
i
could’ve easily given
the
world a cold shoulder
and
just said
forget
about it
i
yam what i yam
but
back then i couldn’t
but
back then i couldn’t
or
rather wouldn’t understand
so
i’m still holding in my hit
as
i await the end of this childhood hangover
and
its like watching my spirit regurgitate my soul
as
my body rejects the bitter truth
but
i suck in more smoke and i hold in that hit
and
i hold on to that rage and that confusion
and
that confusion and that rage
that
rage and that confusion
and
that confusion and that rage
so
i’m still holding in my hit
as
i helplessly sink to the bottom
of
the wave pool of reality
and
i’m calling out to anyone
or
anything that might be listening
to
please toss me a life vest
oh
God
allah,
mohommed, buddha, jesus, moses, confuscious
osiris,
isis, zeus and hades, vishnum brahma, jah, jehova
oh
God
help
this child of yours escape to freedom
No comments:
Post a Comment